“That’s a gas!”

"That's a gas" is an informal, primarily American slang phrase with roots in the 1960s, meaning something is very enjoyable, fun, or amusing. It can also be used to describe something as cool, awesome, or exciting.”

It’s also a descriptive term for flatulence.

So, today, let’s talk about flatulence! We all have them. Literally every human being on the face of the earth — save those monastic types who have taken a vow of hunger and never eat anything — experiences this physical phenomenon. Depending on diet, some might have it more than others, but regardless, WE ALLL PASS GAS.

So, why is it so damn taboo? (And why don't we call it ta-poo?) Except in the company of family, where everyone surely lets ‘em rip for laughs, we are socially constrained to feel uncomfortable broadcasting this bodily function in the presence of the general public. As a matter of fact, other than in your own home, this act is only socially acceptable in restrooms. And still, haven’t many of us  ever been in a public restroom and held it in or tempered it just because someone was in the next stall? There obviously aren’t any laws concerning this, but what gives with this ridiculous stricture or "civilized" custom passed down by our Protestant forebears?

Let’s all admit one thing. It’s NOT healthy to hold it in! Your body is literally trying to expel excess emissions and you are holding it in often at great discomfort because of some silly societal norm? That simply can’t be good for the gut.

Would that we lived in a less uptight society where farting — and burping, for that matter — were simply seen as something au naturel. Hell, in some cultures, burping after a meal is a sign of satisfaction and even a compliment to the chef! We need to loosen up here in America.

Let’s take it a step further and have more fun with it! Have y’all ever have of the game “Fennis”? Yes, that’s a compound word for “fart” and “tennis,” and plays out exactly how you might imagine. One person lets one rip and calls “service.” The other player has 5 minutes to volley, else it is an ace! You can use traditional tennis scoring (which honestly makes ABSOLUTELY no sense) or else you can come up with your own system. Either way, whoever achieves that certain score first, wins! (And also “winds” lol.)

So let’s all break this stupid unofficial fear and let ‘em fly! I suggest a good pregame dinner at the local Mexican family franchise restaurant. Rice and beans for all. Then it’s game on.

What a gas that would be! 

——————-

Please support my work. Patreon subscriptions preferred! But including Venmo and PayPal as well for single donations - for those wary of signing up for new subscriptions lol. 

https://www.patreon.com/davidbryan

Venmo: @David-Bryan10026

Paypal: paypal.me/davidbryanandfriends