The "Idle Janie" Journal - Days 81 through 85
The “Idle Janie” Journal - Day 81
“Campaign Cash”
I donated $25 to Amy McGrath’s election campaign last night. I can’t really afford to be donating to politicians right now. But with Ruth Bader Ginsberg’s body not yet even cold, Mitch McConnell immediately vowed to push through a Supreme Court nomination to fill her seat before the end of the year.
Jesus, man, can her family have at least 12 hours to mourn before you start with your political shenanigans????
Never mind that in 2016, he staunchly refused to even consider Obama’s nominee — a very fair and balanced moderate. And never mind that in that instance, it was eight months before the election, versus a measly month and a half until this year’s election. “Moscow Mitch” has no scruples whatsoever, and will do whatever it takes to advance the conservative agenda. It is hypocrisy of the most in-your-face level imaginable.
I’m so sick of his turtle face and his old southern racist voice. I’m sick of his hypocrisy. I’m sick of his work ethic, as the bills from the House of Representatives continue to pile up on his desk as he refuses to bother with them. I’m sick of his political maneuvering as he does one thing and then says another in front of the cameras. I’m sick of his refusal to compromise, such as when the House sent a $3 trillion coronavirus relief bill, he responded with a $1 trillion answer — from which he wouldn’t budge after the House suggested meeting in the middle. And I’m sick of his “man behind the curtain” subterfuge, as he continues to work behind the scenes to advance an agenda that is in no way representative of the diverse country we live in. It’s his way or the highway, and he’s obviously been bought and paid for many times over — and somehow continues to get re-elected by a constituency that constantly votes against their own best interests. He’s one of the biggest shams in our political history. And it’s time for him to go. That’s why I donated to the McGrath campaign.
Apparently, since RBG passed, the democratic fundraising machine has raised close to $1 million dollars EVERY 15 MINUTES. This is good news if you lean to the left.
But it’s bad news if you have any scruples about money, and how it is spent.
Every single day, my social media feed is swamped with requests for campaign contributions. I get text messages on my phone from both sides of the aisle asking for cash. All of the politicians, lobbyists, and interest groups want to capitalize on your anger all the time — and you can express that anger by donating money to get politicians elected.
Isn’t it time we ALL took a step back and start to conceptualize just HOW much money is spent every year on political advertising? Voters on both sides of the aisle are literally throwing away their earnings so that already-rich people can slander and smear each other’s names. Bernie Sanders rose to fame by capturing the hearts of poor blue-collar types who could scarcely afford their overpriced pharmaceuticals, or who often had to choose between getting the car repaired or putting food on the table. But these folks believed in his platform, and felt that a meager donation of $15 might make a difference in their lives.
But then all of these kinds of one-off donations are swept away by a tsunami of corporate cash, as lobbyists linger in the shadows pulling the financial strings necessary to advance their agenda. According to CBS, the “price tag” of the 2016 election cycle was $6.8 BILLION. THAT’S HOW MUCH WAS INVESTED IN SLANDER AND LIBEL FOR ONE CYCLE. There are federal, state, and local elections every single year all over the country. No, they don’t all bear the brunt of a billion dollar price tag, but you do the math. With so many right now facing unemployment, eviction, and starvation, it’s obvious that all of this money could be put to wiser use.
There has to be a better way.
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Thanks for reading. If you like what you read, and want to support my fledgeling career as a writer and musician, you can drop a few bucks in the virtual tip jar. It all adds up!
Venmo: @David-Bryan10026
Paypal: paypal.me/davidbryanandfriends
💣
The “Idle Janie” Journal - Day 82
“Finally Fall!”
I never thought I’d hear myself say this, but I AM SO GLAD FALL IS FINALLY HERE! Yes, the “official” season isn’t for two more days, but at least the cooler weather is.
I have always loved summer — it has been my favorite season almost my entire life. Of course as a kid that meant no school for a few months; and over the last two decades it means a trip from NYC down to my native NC for beach week. My friend from NJ who is part of that trip has always found humor in my love of heat and direct sunlight. Once we flew to Las Vegas in an unusually cold plane, and as soon as we exited the airport, I went straight for a patch of sunlight and literally basked in the wonderful warmth of 105 degree heat. He thought I was such an oddball. Perhaps he’s right.
I’ve always been blessed with a skinny frame, so I’m sure that’s part of the issue. In general I detest air conditioning. But, I do live in NYC, where there is no such thing as central air as far as apartments are concerned. I don’t know if it’s global warming or climate change or whatever you want to call it, but the last few summers have been brutal. And since I lost my job, I was mostly quarantined this year in my small apartment with no real respite from the heat. I do have a window unit, but it only really cools the bedroom, while the rest of the apartment felt like an oven. Maybe I finally put a few pounds on my skinny frame, so now have that extra layer of insulation. Hey, gotta fill the “storehouse” for the coming apocalypse, right? Either way, this has been a hot and humid summer, and I really appreciate going to sleep each night with the AC unit off, the window open, once again curling up underneath a blanket.
So, for the first time in my life, Autumn is now officially my favorite season. Interesting how different things change throughout the course of one’s life. The caveat to this is that I’m NOT enjoying my annual bout with allergies. They seem particularly boisterous this year. I dunno, maybe I had the coronavirus already, but was one of the lucky asymptomatic carriers. But maybe the virus, which seems to wreak havoc on the body in myriad ways to those who have had it, has altered my chemical makeup such that I’m now especially prone to the allergy season. But, if I had to choose, I’ll take sneezing over sweltering any day of the week.
Anyway, a bunch of “bless you”s to all those out there going through the same!
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Thanks for reading. If you like what you read, and want to support my fledgeling career as a writer and musician, you can drop a few bucks in the virtual tip jar. It all adds up!
Venmo: @David-Bryan10026
Paypal: paypal.me/davidbryanandfriends
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The “Idle Janie” Journal - Day 83
“David, the Irate Hippie”
So, I’ve decided that I’m gonna wrap up the Idle Janie journal. This has been such an incredible experience, writing every day on many different subjects and issues (majority political, to be sure), and has given my overactive underutilized brain something constructive to do on a daily basis so that it doesn’t go stagnant, and I don’t go crazy. For anyone who has been reading these entries every day, I wanted to let you know what trajectory I’m going to attempt now.
The other day, I posted a “pilot episode” for a new idea I have: “David, the Irate Hippie” (video posted below). Since I’ve been writing to little or no fanfare for 80 plus days, I figure maybe people just don’t have time — or want to make the time — to read verbose journal entries. I get it, we’re all busy. And we’ve also been dumbed down by the internet, where 280-character-max Tweets, TikTok videos and Facebook memes are the preferred news source du jour. So, I’m not offended in any way that my posts have been largely ignored! But also not surprised.
However, after 80+ entries, it’s obvious that this is not the best way to get my ideas out for public consumption, or to establish my name as a writer. As stated repeatedly, in addition to writing for my own edification, I’m also actively seeking a way to facilitate ANY kind of freelance career, so that I don’t end up behind a desk again letting my creative juices go to waste. I am profoundly proud of my output the last few months — and also KNOW that there is a larger audience for me somewhere out there.
That being said, my plan is to transition over to the “Irate Hippie” videos — but with an eye to building on my work these last few months, so that it doesn’t just languish unnoticed in the ether. So, I’m basically going to do an accompanying video for each of the Idle Janie entries. Whatever the subject is for each day, I’ll simply create a video covering the same topical material. I’ll do 7 more entries here, so as to reach a nice round number of 90 posts, and then put my energy into a video for each entry. (This will probably not be an “every single day” approach, as it’s also time to invest more energy into my music! And it doesn’t mean I’ll stop writing altogether, as I still have much to say about a great many things — but I can do this on a less frequent basis and just post them in my blog of many years.)
90 posts — that’s basically three months! And is, I humbly submit, an enviable and respectable oeuvre. Immense thanks to those who have read these posts, liked them, shared them, commented on them, and donated money to the virtual tip jar. I hope that you will follow the video blog as it unfolds, and enjoy it as much as you have these writings!
Who knows, after 90 video submissions to accompany each topical entry of the Idle Janie Journal, maybe I’ll then write a song every day to accompany those?
Maybe THEN I’ll finally get some recognition and steady financial backing!
😉
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W_F_uni2GUc
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Thanks for reading. If you like what you read, and want to support my fledgeling career as a writer and musician, you can drop a few bucks in the virtual tip jar. It all adds up!
Venmo: @David-Bryan10026
Paypal: paypal.me/davidbryanandfriends
💣
The “Idle Janie” Journal - Day 84
“IPA, All The WA.A.y”
I mentioned yesterday that I was going to wrap up these journal writings once I hit day 90. And like I said, for someone freshly out of work, it has given me one constructive way to spend my time, as to not become “idle.” Thinking of that benchmark reminded me of another very productive 90 days I embarked on previously.
About five years ago, I reflected on my alcohol consumption. Like any other inhabitant of NYC, “partying” has been a big part of my life up here. In a “city that never sleeps,” one of the easiest things to do is text a buddy in your neighborhood, or knock on your roommate’s door, and say, “Hey, you wanna go grab a drink?” Well, after living here for 20 years, I decided I needed to “check myself,” to make sure I wasn’t an active alcoholic. I won’t go into details as to why I decided this — I’ll just say it was due to a particularly hurtful incident I experienced, and my reaction to it. Which was to anguish over my inability to control the narrative as it unfolded.
You see, alcoholism isn’t just about drinking. It’s about so much more. It is about the lens through which one views everything; about how we respond and react to situations; about trying to get the universe to bend to our will, instead of letting it unfold and accepting it. You can display alcoholic tendencies without ever even touching a drop of the stuff — what is often called being a “dry drunk.”
I was definitely drinking a lot, but this scenario that unfolded was what influenced my decision to “seek help” — or at least to figure out if I needed to seek help. So, for the first time in my life, I found myself in “the rooms,” as professed drunks call them: Alcoholics Anonymous meetings. In a city as big as New York, there is literally a meeting in every neighborhood, and often several times a day. So finding these hallowed halls was an easy exercise. And so I declared, on day one, that I was going to abstain from alcohol for 90 days — as that is often a milestone which people in the program celebrate. And that I would also attend a meeting each of those 90 days, which is strongly encouraged. I made no plans past that. I simply wanted to test myself. I quickly found a sponsor to help me “work the program” outside of the meetings, and read AA literature at night before bed. I even found a therapist who I met with weekly, someone who specialized in working with addicts. All in all, a juicy time commitment.
I gotta say, first of all, that this was one of the most productive periods of my life. If you go out to bars with friends regularly, you never quite realize just HOW much of your life it ends up consuming. You can easily wake up and think to yourself, “What the hell happened to the last 10 years??” Add to that the amount of money wasted, not only on alcohol but also on late night sandwiches and bags of chips, and in retrospect you can realize what a waste of time AND money it really is.
Second of all: that scene in “Fight Club,” where Marla Singer — who isn’t even an addict but just goes to meetings out of boredom — exclaims “It’s cheaper than a movie and there’s free coffee” is SPOT ON. I found these meetings to be not only uplifting and educational, but also downright entertaining. Recovering alcoholics, as a whole, are REALLY good at laughing at themselves. These meetings weren’t only the cheapest entertainment option, they were also usually MORE entertaining than many of the usual options in a big city. I really enjoyed going to these meetings, and was feeling happier and healthier as a result of my commitment.
FAST FORWARD: About half way through, I ended up “firing my sponsor” because I didn’t really dig his style. Then around day 75 or so, my beloved cat Salvador suddenly died, so I quit going to meetings on a daily basis, as I decided my primary commitment was to be present with her sister, China Cat, so that we could grieve together. I still did daily diligence in reading AA literature, and tried to catch meetings when time permitted. But, I decided I had found what I was seeking, so didn’t feel the need to be so “religious” about attendance.
In the final analysis, I found that the religious side of AA wasn’t for me. I am a spiritual person, but simply can’t identify with the behemoth masculine personification of “god” in our culture — which is kind of ironic, since I worked full time for a church for 12 years. And the NECESSITY to ALWAYS capitalize that word has always grated me, since I first came into what I call “spiritual maturity.” And just like the bible, the insistence of incessant capitalization of the third-person singular pronouns for god — He, Him, etc., has always made me cringe just a bit. ALL of the AA literature follows these cultural norms, so they were a huge turnoff.
But the main thing I realized was that even though I could “identify” with many of the points made at meetings — and that I would often listen and find myself saying “Yeah, that sounds like me” — the thing I heard THE MOST in these rooms was a sort of ubiquitous alcoholic refrain: “ALL I need to do is avoid alcohol JUST this one day; tomorrow can wait; one day at a time; etc.” It was at that point, even quite early on, that I realized something. I had made a vow to myself to abstain from alcohol for 90 days. And not ONE SINGLE DAY during that timespan did I have the urge to drink. NOT ONCE. Strike 1.
So, even without these cravings, was there any possible scenario in which I WAS an alcoholic? I decided there wasn’t. Anyone who truly knows me, knows that I love my IPAs, and I usually have a few most nights. But, in case I needed any more confirmation, I also realized that I have never — EVER — not once in my entire life — arisen in the morning and craved alcohol. I have known people over the course of my life who want to hit the bottle as soon as they wake. I have never encountered this feeling, it is completely alien to me. When I wake up, the first thing I crave is a cup of coffee. Alcohol has always been a “night time” activity for me, so that’s strike 2.
Strike 3? I was once in Atlantic City with my buddy, where you are offered free drinks as long as you are actively gambling. We would usually go to Harrah’s Casino, which has a great floor plan with a circular video poker bar right in the middle of the space, where numerous times I was able to enjoy some IPAs while playing. Then all of a sudden on one of our trips, they no longer carried IPA. Disappointed, I asked:
“Well, then, do you at least have a Pale Ale, like Sierra Nevada, or something hoppy?”
“Sorry sir, we only have Coors, Budweiser, Michelob, Amstel and Heineken.”
“Okay, never mind. Just give me a bottle of water.”
So, no, I’m not an alcoholic. I abhor the taste of liquor. I do once in a while enjoy a glass of red wine with a meal. But I’m not even a “Beer Man.” I just really REALLY like the taste of IPA. And I like the feeling of having just a few of them. 😉 Anyway, we refer to them as “adult beverages,” and I’M AN ADULT. So, there you have it. But I ain’t no ding dang alcoholic! And I knew that, before I even reached day 30 of my sobriety test.
I got my “90 day sobriety chip” anyway, as I had put the work in, and wanted something tangible to show for it. Usually your sponsor gets it for you, and they make a presentation in one of the meetings, and everyone applauds you for your courage and stamina. But since I had fired my sponsor, there was nobody to really take notice. So, with little fanfare, I ordered one for myself online LOL — and then celebrated it on day 91 with an IPA in hand. And lemme tell ya: IT WAS WORTH THE WAIT. 😉
Dear reader, if you’re struggling in your life with something — ANYTHING, even if it’s not alcohol — I’d highly recommend picking something new or creative and trying it for 90 days.
It just might change your life.
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Thanks for reading. If you like what you read, and want to support my fledgeling career as a writer and musician, you can drop a few bucks in the virtual tip jar. It all adds up!
Venmo: @David-Bryan10026
Paypal: paypal.me/davidbryanandfriends
💣
The “Idle Janie” Journal - Day 85
“Denn er hat seinen Engeln befohlen über dir”
Throughout the shutdown in NYC, the St. Bartholomew’s Choir (of which I’m a member) has been recording weekly videos for Sunday virtual church services. This has been one of the saving graces of being unable to sing in person with my colleagues, as not performing with other musicians has really impacted my life — and, really, my soul. This week, we dug into one of my absolutely favorites by Felix Mendelssohn.
With so much strife, anger, and animosity in the world today — and especially in the United States — upon recording my part for this Sunday’s service I started to reflect on the power of music. And I couldn’t help but think: music is the answer. To ALL of our problems.
I’m afraid for the future of this country. The Metropolitan Opera just announced today they are canceling the 2020-2021 season due to COVID concerns. And as many of you know, bars and music venues across the state are closed for the unforeseen future. So, there is literally no music. Sure, people are playing in the parks, and some are streaming concerts online. (Like me on Sunday nights at 8pm! SHAMELESS PLUG 😉 ) But with the Met announcement today, with the “Great White Way” (Broadway) shuttered indefinitely, and with music venues declaring bankruptcy left and right, it’s a dark road ahead of us. We need MORE music right now - not less.
I know that many people simply have no musical talent whatsoever, but don’t you think that if more people were able to PARTICIPATE in making music with others, that our country would be a much more peaceful place? I guarantee you that most white supremacists whose presence is obviously on the rise; that most American politicians who seem exponentially more intoxicated with power; that all those Wall Street stock traders who can only speak the language of money — I guarantee you that if all these folks had experienced community and camaraderie through making music with others, then the national narrative would be much different from what it is right now.
Music heals. Music comforts. Music saves. Music inspires. Music elevates. As far as I’m concerned, MUSIC IS HOLY.
Like I said yesterday, I’m not a super religious person these days, but I am, as always, spiritual. And most of that spirituality is deeply rooted in and connected to music, as well as the lyrics or poetry which it accompanies.
Check out the lyrics for this week’s anthem, then listen to the video below. god(ess) knows we all need more of this in the world right now.
Denn er hat seinen Engeln befohlen über dir,
dass sie dich behüten auf allen deinen Wegen,
dass sie dich auf den Händen tragen
und du deinen Fuß nicht an einem Stein stoßest.
For he shall give his angels charge over thee,
to keep thee in all thy ways.
They shall bear thee up in their hands,
lest thou dash thy foot against a stone.
I hope this piece resonates with you on some level. It sure does with me. I’m so blessed that I have been able to actively participate in making music like this (as well as other types of music) on a regular basis for literally most of my life.
And let’s be honest: we could all use some angels right now.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dNNWP8L2K9w
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Thanks for reading. If you like what you read, and want to support my fledgeling career as a writer and musician, you can drop a few bucks in the virtual tip jar. It all adds up!
Venmo: @David-Bryan10026
Paypal: paypal.me/davidbryanandfriends
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